A world beyond one's self.

Ever found yourself lost in the sea of people swarming around you? After watching the day and life video of youtube, I have begun to circumspect my surroundings with a renewed vision. It was around 5:30 when I dragged my heavy school bag( nicknamed suitcase) down the hard rubber-like road when I noticed the crowd around me was not a mere background of bright colors and noises; they were real people, real people with stories and separate lives. Two college students wearing black jackets and jeans were heading off to dinner for a power- up after their long day of studying, an old man was standing in front of the 7-11 counter with a baby carriage counting coins for a piece of candy bar, two elementary school kids with blue and grey backpacks and identical light green uniforms and white sneakers were tiptoeing around motorcycles blocking at least half of the side road, and a middle- aged mother was waving her child and her boyfriend into the car. The world is spinning around me, and it seemed as if at that moment, my existence didn't really matter at all. If I were to disappear tomorrow, the world could very much leave me behind and carry on the other people's lives. Which is why I am not determined to do so. I will never allow the world to abandon me. I want my story to be glorifying and worthwhile, at least to me.

Wooh a tiring day

I know I've repeated this blog post many ties but right now, that is my true state. At this moment, I am trying in attempt to type with my eyes closed. Literally, right now at this moment, I have both of my eyes closed. This is an interesting game that tests my typing ability and also help my concentrate better on the task at hand- finish this blog post. Not that I'm saying that this is a burden or anything, cause it's not. It's really rather easy to just type about your dad expo bialy when s much was going on. Ok, I have a feeling that I have typed something wrong. Well, that's too bad. THe game will not be ober until I finishe typing the entire entry, then I will type at the bottom of the page the mistakes I Have made so you guys might be able to read it. Today, or perhaps you should say yesterday, at one o clock in the morning, I was still up working on biology. For those who had been paying close attention to my blog you wouldn't have missed my quotation " a biology's night out"? I hope not. Cause it was a fun entry. For you to read, not for me to type cause it was 2: 14 in the morning when I climbed up the stairs to fifth floor and was doing the blog post. Ok, so today was tiring. I carried the lightheaded fatgiueness with me wherever I go. I managed to concentrate during school but at ten o clock at night, my concentration gave away to just a feeling of emptiness. Not the kind that your sensitive people feel, like real emptiness. My head feels light, and there really literally is nothing in it. It's as if it was merely a shell hanging there so the rest of my body doesn't freak people out. At this point, I had reopened my eyes and are surprised to find few mistakes! A spelling mistake I made was the worked over which I typed falsely as " ober", and finished which I typed falsely as " finished" and fatigues, which I typed falsely as " fatigueness". Actually , the last word isn't literally a mistake. Yet anyway, seemed like I still learned something.

Blog-Folk Songs about Revolution- When Johnny comes marching home

" When Johnny comes marching home" is an infamous Union song during the american revolution. The song carried out a steady militaristic beat that resembled the steady footsteps of the Union solder as their blue and red stripped flag waved victory. The name " Johnny" is a symbol of the solders from the North, while " Billy" is the symbol for the South. The first part of the song stated how when Johnny comes marching home, a symbolic language for when the Union solders gained victory, how the people rejoiced and welcomed him the best that they could. The second part of the song is similar to the first, it stated how the villagers will make wreaths and will throw him a Jubilee( a kind of anniversary) and celebrate with him by giving him 3 cheers( hip hip hooray three times) . The rest of the song than recited the events happening on each year during the civil war. In 1861 was when the war begun and in 1862, both sides were fighting hard and loosing a lot of men. In 1863, Abe( Lincoln) ended slavery. IN 1864, supporters for Abe grew and many came over to fight.  IN 1865, people predicted there to be a rebellion strife or a fundamental disagreement of the rebellion. THere are a couple of old fashioned vocabularies and old sayings such as " We will give the hero three times three". This, to a typical teenager today may be kind of confusing. This sing basically symbolizes the Union's victory during the war, I liked it because I like the chorus and the strong beat at the background.

A " biology" 's night out

Today, I, a fourteen year old teenage girl who was used to seeing people cheating and copying files off line, just understood why the teachers were so strict about plagiarism. I never used to understand any of this concept. Why do we have to add footnotes? Or bibliographies? Why can't we just copy off other people's work? Today, I had a serious brainstorm that nearly wrecked my head in search of a science topic. After that, I had to spend two~ three hours to make a lame little video that I was not happy about. Now it is 2:12 am, and I am very confused of the date between today and " tomorrow". Technically, " today" to me is " tomorrow" when I am actually in " tomorrow" and " tomorrow" is today. If you, Mr. Dahl, has ever stayed up late at night, which I am sure you had, you would understand my feeling at this moment. Good news, I finished my assignment. Wooh! Now I finally learned to respect other people's ideas and creations because they are precious. Sometimes even more precious than an actual physical item you can hold in your hands. An idea is not palpable, which is what made it valuable. It is irreplaceable, once you have it, it's yours forever to keep. It would be so certainly unfair if someone came up to me and stole my experiment( I'm sure no one would want to though). It's as if they stole my idea without having to contribute ate all.

A mathematical weekend

Ever since Friday, I've started to review for the math chapter test next friday. Now before you became to judgmental, I'll tell you that I suck in math. The only way for me to do well in math is the cold hard way, which is exactly what I have done. Surprisingly to me, it wasn't that much of a pain. On Friday, I finished expository writing and MUN homework. Saturday, it's pretty much outside math and geometry. Today, I finished my application letter and further thought about my biology assignment. I'm going to finish spanish later, wooh! A busy day!

Music and homework

Sometimes, listening to music and doing homework at the same time can be such a luxury. It's hard to believe that it( doing homework) ever could, but it is true. Music just has this kind of effect on people. We have a spanish chapter test tomorrow and under normal circumstances, I should be freaking out and perhaps banging my head on the wall. Yet today, with the aid of music, I actually was pretty concentrated. Although some researches show that listening to music while doing homework can actually lower the efficiency and quality of your work, I find this not true at all. Music is a great way to help a tired brain( which includes everybody in PAS) concentrated, you'd just have to know which kind of music to listen to under which kind of circumstance. When I am studying English, Geometry, Biology, History, or Expository Writing, I'll listen to quiet music such as the classical ones. When I am doing spanish, and drawing posters, or creating some powerpoint presentation, I'll be listening to pop or other kinds of music common to kids my age. I found this method effective, and I suggest all of you give it a shot.

Today

Today was a day of great emotional turbulence. I was permitted to go to school today, but when I opened my veracious, I spotted that several of my assignments were late because of my absence. My mood  dropped quick and steady. The rest of the day didn't wasn't anywhere near a blast either. I sat on my chair a long time worrying about my expository writing quiz tomorrow and wondered, " What is seriously wrong with me?" I just hope today and tomorrow can past quickly so I can finally be released from this burning prison of hell( sorry for being kind of cliche, it that's what you call it). I'm just so worried throughout today that I didn't even get to enjoy any part of it. Sucks. Suck like hell.

Yeah!

WE didn't have our spanish chapter test today, and suddenly I felt as if I was half as light. Yeah! For the rest of the week, I wool no longer have to worry about spanish! Wouldn't that be great? Tonight I'd still have to study for biology though, but still, two grace days without spanish. I'm planning to take a little break tonight perhaps for one hour? Yeah, one hour would be great. I know my journal entry today is totally random, loquacious, boring and a number of other negatives...but I'm just suddenly overwhelmed with indescribable relief. I'm sure that as a student, or once as a student, you would be able to comprehend my feelings.

Untitled

I'm titling this entry " untitled" since don't know what it's going to be about yet. I had a tiring practice in basketball today and right now my mind is blank. Or " vacant" as Mr. Dahl might have put it. Now I know my next sentences is totally, but my arm totally itches. I have no idea why though. Great, now I struggle with coming up with a simple 100 words when yesterday I could easily come up with 200. Funny how your ability change in just a matter of hours right? I will have to give my speech during MUN tomorrow and I should probably start preparing. I hope my journal today wasn't totally random, but I suppose it is. As I've previously stated, my mind is a vacant blank of hollow space.

THe grass is greener on the other side (2)

I found our class journal today inspiring so I decided to expand on it a little more on my personal journal. I was going to make this another journal of endless complaint of how hard life can be as a ninth grader, but I figured that this one would be so much more entertaining. True, I really don't exactly envy people. I may admire them, but I certainly don't envy them. For some reasons, my emotions never reached such negative levels. Taking my first grade classmate for an instance, I admired her greatly and viewed her almost as if my idol, but my emotions never turned negative. I never wished for her to leave the school, I never wished for her to wake up one morning and become shirek( funny story, perhaps I'll share with you guys in the next entry) , and neither have I ever wished for her to become anything negative. I suppose the simplicity of my mind was just not capable to comprehend such complicated emotion as " envy" and " jealousy". Those emotions are for smart people, those who had the wits to actually look around and feel bad about not having something that others do. Simple people like me can only look in, and there, we found out safe heaven.

THe power of music (2)

Last time we discussed about how good music can lighten up one's mood and make the world a far pleasant place than it truly is, today, I'm going to discuss about music that does exactly the opposite. My radio is playing One republic's " Good Life" at the moment and I decided that I hated this song. I don't know what's so good about this melody and why it is so popular. Maybe it has something to do with my situation now. I mean, here I am, doing homework on 1:00 am and still can't finish it. Sigh. Sigh. Sigh. I almost forgot to do journal today, and I can't miss out another journal.

Not doing so well....

I haven't been doing so well this week so far. Weariness from last week still followed me like a silent shadow,I tried to shake it off, but it still followed me. Tomorrow it Thursday! After that will be Friday! That will be great! THe day I've been waiting for. At this moment I am listening to that song I mentioned during my last entry again, and I still found it a great song. It can really motivate people despite the most difficult times. Music has the power to do that sometimes. I'm listening to this song for like the forth time this week? And I still can't get tired of it. Only good music

The power of music

These three weeks were so suppressing that seemed to have squished the breath right out of me, but today, through music, I smiled for the first time. It's a very simple song sung by a japanese little girl called Ayumi and it was the most beautiful thing ever. I felt my heart rise for the first time in weeks after listening to her beautiful singing. The girl is about six or seven years old? Her voice was pure and without correction or elaboration, the best and purest kind of music. Even though the only words I can understand from the song was " saiyonana" which means goodbye in japanese, I felt deeply connected to this little girl and the song she sang.

Remote

By now, I feel a sudden remote towards the biology midterm tomorrow. I don't know why. One moment ago I was still freaking out, but now I suddenly felt nothing but peace. In my journal blog today, I would like to give my genuine praise to a 15 year old english singer- " Birdy" who has an amazing voice. Right at this moment, I am listening to her cover of " The a team". It was really amazing. Birdy's voice has an amazing an amazing edge, the lilt of her voice made everything seem beautiful. Tomorrow I will finally be free from the burden of midterms for the first time since this week. Yeah! And for those who am reading my journal, check out Birdy!

Today

I am still looking forward to Friday, which is the single thing that motivated me throughout the entire week. Imagine after my biology midterm on Friday, I can be carefree and happy. HOw good would that be? Just incase you don't get that this is a rhetorical question, I 'll answer it. It would be great. By this moment I am running out of ideas to write for my blog, things are just so dull this week. Nothing but tests, test, and more tests. I'm sure you wouldn't want to hear about tests would you? I stayed up pretty late yesterday so now I am heavy with weary, which is why I'm going to end my blog post right HERE.

Midterm

Mid term week will be over soon! Although my heart is heavy with anxiety, I am still looking forward to the weekend to come. Even though I'd still have to study for math during the weekends, it will still be like heaven compared to my life this week. This week I am living in hell. literarily. THere is no exaggeration of any kind as I pronounce the word " hell". THere was no free time and I wake up everyday tired and weary. Worse, I didn't get as much time to study as some( or let's make it "an" other" classmate. Sucks! I still have MUN homework to do, and I've only gone mid way. This week is just....I just hope it will be over soon.